Living Musically – Saturday Sillies

D: In which A combines news and music.

A: I think all news should be delivered musically.

D: So, should dirges accompany bad news and magical themes accompany happy news?

A: Other way around, really – you know just to see if people are paying attention.

D: You make no sense.

A: It’s Saturday sillies, D. I’m not supposed to. Plus, I’m on my third cup of high-test coffee. There will be no sense-making today.

D: Good to know. You don’t actually have that theme song on your phone, do you?

A: No. And that’s probably a good thing. That was The Boy’s contribution to today’s show.

D: Although, it does get me thinking. . .

A: Don’t think, D. Let’s dance instead.

D: You know who loves Bowie, A?

A: Helena. Helena loves Bowie.

D: Too right, and you know what’s going on with Helena today?

A: An Ask.FM Q&A session.

D: Right again – Do you know why?

A: Okay, I said I was a little over-caffeinated, not in need of having lines fed to me! Helena’s successful Kickstarter is over in just three hours (go – preorder now if you haven’t! There are some excellent incentives) today, and to celebrate, she and Jim Squires will be answering questions all afternoon on Ask FM.

D: And how do you plan on celebrating?

A: Well, first by joining her, and second, by putting the lime in the coconut.

D: Are those gorillas?

A: Yes.

D: Gorillas singing and playing instruments, singing about putting the lime in the coconut?

A: Again, yes.

D: This isn’t silly Saturday. This is surreal Saturday.

A: What, you never let your hair down?

D: Very droll, A.

A: So you’re telling me you’ve never gone full monty?

D: A! What a question to ask – you’re going to make a grown warrior blush.

A: Not bloody likely. Answer the question, Druid.

D: Does going  bare in the basin count?

A: In this case, yes. Totally. Speaking of natives. . .

D: This is more of your belated St. Patrick’s Day tribute, isn’t it?

A: What? I love me some Christy, D.

D: Wasn’t there supposed to be news in here?

A: Ah, yes, so there was – thank you, D. In Middle-Earth News, Gandalf needs help. He has a lot on his mind and if he doesn’t find what he’s looking for, I fear–

D: Seriously, A?

A: What? It’s hysterical (And many thanks to Perry for posting that and making my Friday – I’m a lurker on her site, and it just made me smile).

D: . . .

A: Almost as hysterical as this Oakentoon.

D: Are you quite finished?

A: Maybe.

D: Finally, I was—

A: Oh, wait! There’s middle-earth madness going on now.

D: . . .

A: Because, you know, it’s basketball season – I think – and people are betting on stuff, but I don’t know anything about basketball, so voting on Middle-Earth matchups seems so much more entertaining.

D: You know, A . . . I think. . .

A: Yes?

D: Hang on, I’m getting there. I think that you should put this in your pipe and smoke it.

A: That is not the Eddie Izzard clip I listened to in the car.

D: No. No it is not.

A: This one is better.

D: Yes. Yes, it is.

A: And with that, I think our Saturday Sillies are over.

D: Really?

A: Well, in the blogosphere. . . for now.

D: And with that threat, we bid you all a fond adieu.

A: Thank you for reading, everyone and have a great weekend!

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Zeke and Friends  Picture Courtesy Google Images, labeled for commercial reuse.

Zeke and Friends
Picture Courtesy Google Images, labeled for commercial reuse.

The Zombie looked to the left and immediately regretted it. There was Jenny, from Human Resources.

She was after him, he just knew it.

Not after him, like he’d broken the rules . . .  again . . .  but after him, like she dug the skin-peeling, gangrene-smelling, reanimated corpse look.

Bill-Z in Accounting said she had a dominance thing. She liked the fact that Zombies – or Zs – were docile.

Then what was she doing, going after him? He was docile, sure. It was tough to avoid the medical cocktail that made Zs productive members of the workforce, but there was never a company rule he met that he didn’t want to break.

It wasn’t his fault. The man he’d been before the Change had nearly taken down the firm dodging the SEC, the NSA, and the FBI, to name a few. But man, it had been fun, and the money he’d made. . . .

Nah, those days were gone. Joining the ranks of the Z was meant to “forgive” the faults of one’s humanity.

And forgiveness meant he was now fodder for Jenny in Human Resources. Because he was docile. Right?

No. Bill-Z in Accounting was docile.

“She liked to tell me I’d been a bad boy,” Bill-Z told him once while they lingered over the manufactured meat product cooler. “And I just never could. I’m not a bad boy, Zeke.”

So, that was Jenny’s game. The punishment factor. Yeah, he’d been a bad boy, once upon a time. He had been a fast-talking corporate shark with a yen for pretty young things – man or woman, it didn’t matter, just so long as everyone was having a good time.

And everyone had a good time with Zeke. Even now, he could still throw down. Sometimes. Usually it was his left arm, but it always got a laugh out of someone.

Every once in a while, he thought the stiffs up north had a point: to be a Z was to be enslaved. We didn’t start out docile, they said. The docs had to cure the overwhelming hunger for living flesh and the need to feast on brains.

Of course, a new Z rarely got a chance to say no to the cure – it was done within the first three minutes of the Change. Those that weren’t seen to . . . well, they were up north, talkin’ hot but keepin’ chill.

How’s that for a resistance movement slogan?

Huh. Up north.

Maybe.

But maybe he could have one last fling before he ditched this land of endless cubicles.

He looked back at Jenny and winked.

Yeah baby. I’ve been a real bad boy.

***

D: There is a modern phrase your people use, which I think describes your response to Papi Z’s prompt, “The Zombie looked to his left and. . . “ beautifully.

A: Pray tell.

D: You are sick in the head, woman.

A: Since I talk to you on a regular basis, I’m pretty sure everyone already knows.

D: I understand. But sometimes saying it keeps the night-terrors at bay.

A: (Eye-roll) Whatever helps you sleep at night, D. Personally, I kind of like Zeke.

D: I can’t believe you gave him that name. I can’t believe you invited a zombie into your head as a character. He’s stinking up the place, A.

A: Oh, cut him some slack – he hasn’t made it up north yet, and Jenny did give him a run for his money.

D: Words cannot describe how vile that is.

A: Well, while you’re speechless, I’m going to share some tidbits with the good people. You okay with that.

D: (retching noises).

A: Oh, that’s just gross, D. Anyone would think you haven’t seen someone’s arm come off before. Geeze.

Anyway, Charles is organizing a February Giveaway and has a donation request for the published authors out there.

D: And SK Nicholls is giving an autographed paperback copy of her book, Red Clay and Roses away at Goodreads.

A: The Community Storyboard has some amazing news: IT’S BACK!! Ready and raring to go with new guidelines, the Community Storyboard is once again accepting submissions. Check it out!

D: Speaking of wonderful places, with wonderful people, Ionia, at Readful Things, featured A and I as bloggers of the week last week. It was so unexpected, and so delightful, both of us are still smiling about it.

A: He’s not wrong (for once). Thank you Ionia! We love you! We also love The Year Long Story project at Line by Line, which she has put together with Julian.

D: Not to mention her ponderings at Ionia’s Thought Catalogue. which is a window into, as she says, the crap that doesn’t fit into her main blog. Gotta love a woman who’s so honest!

A: Speaking of honest, and delightful – the woman who may or may not be the most reliable narrator (but no one cares because her narration among the most amazing I have ever read) is out with a new Jessica B. Bell story, Eat My Pussy.

D: . . .

A: Stop snickering, D. Seriously, how old are you?

D: Chronologically or bodily?

A: . . .

D: That was rhetorical, wasn’t it?

A: Yeah. Anyway, go read Helena’s story, AND the continuation of the Bayou Bonhomme serial, and when you are done with those (believe me, you’ll gobble them up) check out the fact that Volume 1 of her memoirs are about to debut. Last I checked, she was looking for cover reveal volunteers! I’m so excited for her, D!

D: Me to. And not just because she titles some of her stories—

A: That’s enough, D.

D: Killjoy.

A: Takes one to know one.

D: Point taken.

A: And, case rested. That’s all for tonight, folks! Thank you for reading and have a wonderful evening!

The show goes on

Empty-stage-with-spotligh-004D (Enters stage right. Looks around, startled. It’s empty and quite dark): Hello? Hello, A? Where are you?

A: (Offstage, left): You’ll have to go on without me, D!

D: But I can’t – I don’t know how to make it out there on my own. It’s so dark, and and there’s set pieces I have to put out.

A: Welcome to my world, D.

D: Your world is kind of scary.

A: You’re telling me! At least there’s glow tape.

D: Glow tape?

A: Yeah, it’s this tape that glows in the dark. Oh my god, best thing ever in the whole entire world I could marry it.

D: I’m not sure that would be the most fulfilling of relationships, but . . .

A: I was speaking in hyperbole.

D: Ah, so in the midst of all this “play stuff” you do remember your writerly roots.

A: I never – oh forget it. I managed to finish major re-writes and edits this weekend, D. One final read-through and it’s heading into the hands of those who can really read.

D: Writing, working and managing to become a valued member of the backstage crew – how do you find the time?

A: I think I may have given up cooking actual meals, and there hasn’t been a whole lot of sleeping either. Oh, that and I had to give up blogging for a few weeks.

D: At least the post you left as your last was an cover preview for Charles Yallowitz’s new book, Legends of Windemere: Allure of the Gypsies. Did you know that it debuted on December 1?

A: I did know that. I was feverishly editing and finalizing props at the time, but I was sending him good thoughts.

D: Well, all the same, you should congratulate Charles.

A&D: Congratulations, Charles!

D: So that’s it then – you’re just going to wander off stage left and leave me here?

A: No, you can come if you want. We’ll just close the curtain until the 16th when the show run is over. Besides, I kind of like hearing your voice when I’m reading. Your snark helps me not want to cry when you’re being your epic but wounded self in the book. Need a little perspective, you know?

D: (Eye-roll) Gee, A.

A: I’m sorry, what was that? You need to enunciate more, D – remember, diction and volume!

D: The 16th can’t come soon enough!

A: You’re telling me – that set has some ridiculously heavy pieces!

So that’s it, folks! My son has the part of “Young George” in a local production of It’s a Wonderful Life. Being the helpful sort, I volunteered for props and ended up ensuring all the set pieces from the left side of the stage go out on cue, in their proper order without killing myself or others. At least I get a headset!

This, plus working in semi-retail in the weeks leading up to the holidays, is why I am a very bad blogger. Yet, I’m not too terribly broken up about it – I’ve rediscovered the ease of a quick post on Facebook, as well as the joys of being completely unavailable for hours at a time during the 3 and 4 hour evening rehearsals! So, I miss you all, but the trade-off of time with my son is priceless. Thank heavens the Mukwonago Village Players are a fabulous group of people. Working with them has been a lot of fun. We did two shows today for local school kids and everyone did a fantastic job. Can’t wait to see what the next two weeks brings!

Now, if you will excuse me, I intend to enjoy my first evening home in several days with some pizza, a glass of wine, a fuzzy blanket and some Torchwood! Good night all – thank you for reading!

 

Seven Swans A-Swimming

On the seventh day of NaNo, my true muse gave to me

Seven shows a-sassing,

Six books a-writing,

Five Syllables!

Four pumpkin cakes

Three cough drops

Two cuddly cats

And a family that’s dear to me.

***

D: Seven shows a-sassing?

A: Do you have something better?

D: Seven Dwarves a-singing?

A: It’s 13 dwarves, D.

D: I did not mean those dwarves, A.

A: So that means you didn’t intend for me to showcase the Desolation of Smaug end credits song here?

D: No.

A: Too late!

D: You have no shame. So tell me about this show that was “a-sassing.” Can a show really sass?

A: You sass, why can’t a show sass?

D: I think you just like the word.

A: Perhaps – it is, after all, you with an “s” added to the front.

D: Me with an “s” added… are you calling me Superman?

A: Seriously?

D: (Grin)

A: (Eye roll) I just spent the last three hours of my life couch-bound and near-voiceless, wheezing and laughing along with Spaced. Totally wacked-out, totally awkward, and totally hilarious.

D: And totally sassy?

A: Now you’re just mocking me.

D: . . . yes. And doing quite well, might I add.

A: Quite. I didn’t look it up, but I’m fairly certain there’s a horror story incorporated into each episode. What can I say? I thought the show was pretty spectacular.

D: Oh well that is simply fascinating (yawn). So I’ll just wander on off –

D: Oh my gods, what was that?!

A: Hm. Sorry. Dragon.

D: . . . . ?

A: I can’t talk well, but he certainly can.

D: Indeed – he launches it pretty well too. I think he singed my cloak.

A: Indeed! (Grin) ‘Night, D.

D: Do I need to be concerned about the Dragon, A?

A: I don’t know what you’re talking about, D – now if you’ll excuse me?

D: No, I don’t think we’re done discussing the Dragon, A. A? A, come back here! Bloody woman!

This is the seventh in a series on my own brand of NaNoWriMo – or rather, my Non-NaNo. Gotta love those dragons! And that sassy show. Stay tuned for what tomorrow will bring in our 30 days of NaNo.

Related Posts

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 | Day 6

Talented Taliesin Tells Tall Tales

By Green Embers

By Green Embers

I’m baaaack – admit it, you missed the troubadour extraordinaire, the bardest with the mostest, the Druid who is fluid (with words)–

D: What are you doing, A?

A: Oh, Hi D. Um, I’m impersonating you?

D: Go to bed, woman, and leave the tale telling to the pros.

A: So you know how you have yet to take corporeal form outside of my head? If I go to bed–

D: You know what I meant.

A: All right, all right – take it away, Taliesin.

D: Taliesin was Welsh.

Rome Construction Crew

Allow me to start with a round of felicitations to Green Embers, proprietor of the Rome Construction Crew. It may be the place that A goes to hide from me, but it is my belief that she comes back stronger and better able to face the magnificence that is yours truly. Don’t look at me like that; I can be benevolent.

Without further ado, here is what you’ve been missing over at the Rome Construction Crew. For encouragement, goal-setting and general fun, there is no place better.

Literary Syndicate

Papi-Z has style, pizzazz and more than a little desire to help promote artists, writers, poets and all sorts of creative people. Check out the Literary Syndicate, in particular his interview with Red Clay and Roses author, SK Nicholls, and his own version of tale-telling, the Syndicate Shout-outs.

Prompted

Are you at a loss for words? Do you find your mind drawing a blank and need just that edge to help it move again? Me neither, but A insists that prompts are just the thing. As such, here are two prompts to whet your whistle, light your fire and help you spin that tale.

At the community storyboard, they’re talking about angst and longing. In poetic form. Go on, read them all and just in case, bring your tissues, and perhaps something to thrash in your frustration. And if you’ve a mind to, submit your own poem.

The Prompt for the Promptless this week, at The Queen Creative, is lapsus linguae. We’ve all had a slip of the tongue (Keep it clean, D. Erotica week was two weeks ago. . . A, seriously. Tee hee) and this is your opportunity to share it with the world.

A: Could a post on lapsus linguae itself be a slip of the tongue?

D: Do you honestly think these things at this hour?

A: Yes.

D: I knew there was a reason I was in your head. How about impossible things before breakfast?

A: At least 10. But you’re getting off topic. Move on, D.

Super-freaky

It seems fitting that the Bayou Bonhomme Serial is continuing into October. Enjoy every deliciously creepy bit of it  over at Being the Memoirs of Helena Hann-Basquiat, Dilettante, especially the latest installment, The Truth Will Out.

The OneRing.Net challenges you – if you like this sort of fan-fiction thing – to re-write Tolkien as Poe. It’s potentially terrifying (in many ways) and equally fitting for October.

Are you not entertained?

When is a cliché a trope, a standard, a time-honored tradition? Charles Yallowitz looks for answers to that question at the Legends of Windemere: One Man’s Cliché is Another Man’s Entertainment.

Speaking of words and entertainment, WordCloud Wednesday is one of A’s favorite things. Check out this week’s offering at wePoets Show It. 

Honorable Mentions

A: Because apparently a week cannot go by without me mentioning The Hobbit, cast your hearts, minds and soul on the latest trailer for The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug. TC has already declared that sushi and The Hobbit will be acceptable for his birthday celebrations. I can’t think of a better way to turn 13 than with dragons.

Because Smaug is awesome.

D:  What she means is that the voice distorter on Mr. Cumberbatch is awesome, but you know, that’s just me.

A: Jealous.

D: Jealous?! Me? Of a dragon. Voiced by a man. Voiced by a tall, gangly English man.

A: Yeah. Of a dragon.  Of Sherlock. Of Kha-freakin-an. Jealous.

D: And with that, we will end our tale-telling. I hope you visit our dear friends and enjoy what you see. But most importantly, you have my deepest regards for visiting with us here at the D/A Dialogues.

In Dublin’s fair city (Day 9 Prompt)

Still AWOL today, but I thought I’d share my thoughts on my favorite city, from Day 9 of the Creative Writing Challenge. Enjoy!

Woke up in love this morning

Good morning!

Good morning!

Well, not really – not in the romantic sense, at least.

I had a post all ready to go to A) dispute the Druid and his pompous proclamations, and B) analyze just why I am moping.

Instead, I chucked it out the window. To quote my favorite doppelganger: bored now.  Besides, the Druid is right (don’t tell him I said that – I’ll never hear the end of it if he finds out).

D: I heard that.

A: Oi! This is my spot. Sundays are my day!

D: Yes, but you seem to lose the plot when you start talking all by yourself. I’m just here to keep you on track.

A: Right. . .

D: And to help with the humor factor.

A: I wasn’t trying to be—

D: And that’s why you fail.

A: Oi, D!

D: Yes?

A: Fine, whatever. May I continue?

D: Be my guest, but keep it snappy, A.

A: I was going to say something about following my own advice and not take my characters – or myself – too seriously, but it seems rather beside the point, now.

D: Indeed. I think you need to limit your poignant posts to once-a-month. Any more than that and you might tax your sensibilities beyond their limit.

A:  . . .

D: I’m just looking out for you, A.

A: You’re just looking out for your book.

D: Yes, but for me, A, they are one and the same.

A: RIght, and on that note . . . take a gander at the page, my friends. I’ve added two links at the top. One is for “Other Fiction” and the other is “Defining the Dialogue.” The first is rather self-explanatory, but the second—

D: Why do we need defining, A?

A: You’ve said it yourself, no one else is inside my brain—

D: (Consider yourselves lucky – it’s a tough place to escape).

A: And Defining the Dialogues is a timeline of sorts for The Book. Oftentimes our dialogue centers on passages I’ve written. Decoding puts them in chronological book order –

D: Or as good as, considering it’s a time-travel story.

A: D, you’re not helping. Posts pertaining to Part 1 of The Book have all been listed. I’ll work on Part 2 this week, and since we have yet to post about Parts 3 and 4, those will go live as they happen.

D: You made it live without completing it!? A!

A: It was 2 in the morning, D – I wanted something to show for the insomnia!

D: She really needs to get out more.

A: And stop focusing on word count. Can I just say how happy I am going to be when July is over?

D: You and everyone else, A.

A: Cheers, D – good night all. Lifting a glass to fun snark, from here on out.