Gods do swear

Gods do swear,

I had years,

Of stolen breath.

Living trouble?

Wrong.

Living god.

D: A, A, why are you doing this to me?

A: Doing what?

D: Torturing me!

A: Thanks for the support, D.

D: You are the first person to admit you’re not really made for this sort of thing. I mean, there’s that up there and then there was the response to Dean’s September 1 prompt at the Community Storyboard. It really must end.

A: I know D, but I’m trying to learn.

D: . . .

A: Fine. Put it this way, you are made for this sort of thing and you fail, on many occasions, to impart your wisdom. What is the point of having a centuries-old Druid camped out in your brain if he won’t teach you how to turn a bit of prose now and again?

D: Job security?

A: D! You are a Druid – you are a born tale-teller, a master at words, an orator and mystic. I can do an okay limerick.

D: Sometimes.

A: Exactly.

D: I still don’t get it.

A: (Sigh) You’re a 7th century Pict. They had a written language, but much of their histories and stories were told through song and oratorical extravaganzas. Since the next two books spend a fair chunk of time in the 7th century, it would behoove me to at least be able to give a few lines here and there of your mastery.

D: Ha, you said I had mastery.

A: D, pay attention.

D: (snicker) I have mastery!

A: D!!

D: Okay, fine. Do I understand you correctly in that you would like to learn how to write a stylized oratory extravaganza in order to do my mastery justice?

A: I don’t know why I even try talking to you some days.

D: Because I have mastery.

A: (Eye roll) Fine. Yes. I want to learn. You’re the one who plopped the Ballad of Dubhshìth and Mairead in my lap at the last minute (name changer!) and I want to do it justice. At least, I want to fake well enough so you sound marginally eloquent.

D: Oh! So now I’m eloquent and masterful.

A: Someone shoot me.

The Druid Tells the Tale

D: Because I’m masterful.

A: I take that back – can someone shoot the Druid?

D: Oi, I’m talking here!

I criticize A all the time. Of course, it is rare that she listens to me, which is why you have this blog. If you have an eagle-eye for detail and would like to be told the truth of your own work, check out Diamonds or Dust, an unbiased critique group for serious writers.

A: There is so much fun at the Community Storyboard, but please check out the first-ever, CSB chain-story event, Squirrels: This Time Its Personal. Each episode just gets better and better.

D: In case you didn’t see it the first time, Ionia Martin, Queen of Readful Things and all of us, her minions, beat cancer. Can we give the lady the biggest hug the blogosphere has ever seen? Please? Tell her the Druid sent you.

A: D – I think Ionia might like this:

D: . . .

A: She said something about a pole dancing, and I’m just wondering if this is what happened after.

D: You mock me, but I am sill masterful.

A: I’ve created a monster.

Speaking of Ionia and Queenlieness, Part 2 of the Query Letter Series is now available. This post series is helpful, to the point, and takes a lot of the fear out of creating something an editor or an agent – or rather, their hapless assistants – might want to read and (gasp!) respond to in a positive fashion!

D: Speaking of which. . .

A: Editing, D. Editing.

D: So you say . . .

Since A is editing, take your fill from a published writer, a one Charles Yallowitz, Scribe of Windemere, whose work “Sari Fairy Tale” is available for view at wePoets Show It.

What was the wackiest thing (to you) that you learned to do in order to write a story, get a job, or do that thing that you’ve wanted to do so learning to walk on your hands backwards really didn’t seem so wacky after all??

 

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I have smote thine enemy

Some of the best news I’ve heard all day – and the Druid is doing a dance, just for you, Ionia!

readful things blog

Fireworks 123   For four long years the woman battled the demon. The demon known only as “C” violated her body, dimmed her future and messed with her mind.

She fought this demon with the strength of her army. When she was too weak to fight, too tired to resist the demon’s advances or too negative to be positive she relied on them to battle it for her. Were she the soppy type, she might be wiping her eyes on her chain mail at the moment. *Hold on I have something in my eye…

Okay, all better.

 

So back to the story. The woman fought this vile beast year after year. The demon would weaken, but refuse to relent. Just when she thought it may tire and leave her be, it would come back again, stronger than ever, somewhere else.

Gathering all the love she had been storing, she forged a…

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The prayers heard ’round the world

D: Have you heard, A? A? What are you doing – stop eating and pay attention!

A: I’m allowed–

D: A! I mean it, put down the peanut butter.

A: Fine, fine – what has your . . . is that a kilt? You’re older than kilts, D–

D: Woman!! Have. You. Heard?

A: What? Oh, well, yes – I have but since you seem so emphatic about the whole thing, why don’t you help spread the word?

D: Cheers, A. For those who haven’t heard, the Queen, the Phoenix, the lovely Ionia Martin had surgery to eradicate the cancer that had decided to make her body its home. The . . . what is it called, A?

A: Cyberknife.

D: A, sometimes your world is truly remarkable.  Charles gave us an update that the surgery with the cyberknife was a wonderful success – thank you, Charles.

A: And Dean, of Dean’s Doodlez, recast Marvel’s Phoenix with Ionia: The Phoenix has risen! It is fantastic! I’m certain there are more tributes, congratulations, and news (like this, from the Grand Dame herself) out there, but we just had to share.

D: We continue to keep Ionia in our thoughts, hearts and prayers as she recovers from giving cancer a beat-down–

A: A beat-down?

D: Isn’t that how you say it? What? You said kicking cancer’s ass, yesterday!

A: I did, and that’s about as close to slang as I get – unless it’s weird and/or old fashioned slang.

D: Are you calling me weird and/or old fashioned? Is that what you’re implying?

A: Well, if the kilt fits. . . !

D: Well, yes it does – thank you.

A: Oh boy – you’ve been listening to Ionia too much – lady, you’ve created a monster! Get better soon and keep him in line, will you, please?!?

PS: this is this blog’s 100th post – I can’t think of a better way to celebrate it than with this post. Sorry Charles, “a better person who cannot be named” will have to be named at a later date!

The Druid Tells the Tale . . . for Ionia

There is a woman on this place you call the blogosphere. Her name is Ionia Martin, and she is Queen. It has been my honor, in my travels, to serve as advisor to clan lairds and sing at their hearth; I have known kings and scholars, and yet I have known none like Ionia.

I have the deepest respect for this fiery woman, who could slay man and beast with her words and her wit, and yet is kind and strong. Both A and I bow before her talent with words as she brings them to life. She has graced us with her friendship, an honor of which we are scarcely worthy.

Tomorrow, Ionia does battle against a foe none can see, but is insidious. Tomorrow, she enters the fray and by the grace of the gods, she will come out on the other side victorious. I have seen war, but I have seen none battle so valiantly. On all days, both A and I hold Ionia in our hearts and in our minds, but tomorrow it is even more important. We ask you to do the same.

~ Dubh an Súile mac Alasdair (D)

 

Ionia, we love you, lady. Thank you for being you – you are fantastic, and I know you will kick cancer’s ass.

~ Katie (A)

 

PS: There are so many people out there praying for Ionia. Head over to the full list at Green Embers’ blog or the Community Storyboard.

Save Ionia, Save the World

D: Rodrigo?

A: That’s what you have to complain about, D? The name of the Squirrel Commandant?

D: It’s just that there’s so much, A.

A: . . .

D: Fine, it’s a lovely tribute, A. We all love Ionia and honestly I can’t imagine anything better than a war fought with cupcakes. There. Are you happy?

A: Ha! I win.

D: And here I was just getting used to the silence. . .

Step up to the Mark and be counted! Writing Prompt

D’s saving himself for our contribution to the prompt, but believe me when I say this comes from the bottom of my heart and D’s dark soul… Get Well Soon, Ionia – teach those alien chipmunks a lesson!